As you know it is hard for a parish with only one priest to be able to do Sunday Confessions, as that same priest is also preparing for and celebrating the Liturgy. However we at Holy Cross are blessed to have the opportunity to have Fr. Myron come to us about once a month to allow for this to happen. He is here with us on most “First Sundays” of each month.
Of course, confessions are also available with Fr. Bo at any time during the week when he is available. So please don’t hesitate to call or text him. (Emails also work, but are much slower)
About the Holy Mystery of Reconciliation (Confession)
The Father, Son and Holy Spirit are selfless in all their actions, constantly pouring fourth their love for each other. We humans are made in the image and likeness of this self-giving God. We are created to constantly grow in communion with God, through self-less relationships.
In the beginning when God created humanity we read that a serpent tempted us to eat some fruit promising that: “your eyes will be opened and you will be like God’ (Genesis 3:5). The problem was not in being like God, but rather the problem was taking the fruit for ourselves when it was not ours to be taken.
Our selfish act of taking caused us to be subject to death and corruption (as God had warned). Now we live in a world where things around us are not all in harmony. We get sick, we get hungry, we need shelter, and we eventually die. Due to fear of death have a tendency to sin even more (i.e. be self-serving). However God wants us to return to our true nature (of being self-less) and to have eternal life with Him once again. God Himself came down amongst us, He conquered death, and therefore we no longer need to fear death. Death being conquered, we can now be with God eternally.
Thank goodness God offers His forgiveness freely. God does not hold our shortfalls against us, but rather he looks forward to our repentance and renewed goodness. The only thing that separates us from God (now that He has trampled death) is ourselves. We only have to ‘get up’ when we ‘fall down’, admit that we fell and move on. To gain God’s forgiveness we only need to ask for it.
To be able to ask for forgiveness we need to realize that we have done wrong in the first place. Just like an addict that thinks that they are still in control, cannot receive help until they realize and admit that they have a problem, so it is with us. Until we can recognize our selfishness (inhumanity) we cannot accept God’s forgiveness. Not recognizing our own inhumanity is perhaps one of the greatest of our self-serving acts.
We need to examine our lives regularly and strive to reconcile ourselves with God and our brothers and sisters in order to be truly human. When we recognize that we have done wrong, and we have a desire to turn our lives back to God (metanoia), we to come to the Holy Church in the Sacrament of Reconciliation (a.k.a. confession).
WHY SHOULD I CONFESS TO A PRIEST?
The Church has seven sacraments in which we know that reality both on heaven and earth are affected. Reconciliation is one of these sacraments. Through sacred orders the priest receives the faculty to forgive or not forgive sins, however the priest is not the one you are confessing to; rather he is merely a tangible witness to your conversion experience.
The priest lets us hear the words we dearly need to hear: “You are forgiven.” He can also give you advice and help you overcome your struggles. At the same time, the priest keeps you honest with yourself and with God; if he senses that you are not sincere and have no intention to grow spiritually, then he will not give you absolution.
In the early church people would confess before the whole congregation, to make it easier and less scandalous the priest stands in alone for the whole Church.
WHAT SCRIPTURAL REFERENCES DO YOU HAVE ON CONFESSING?
Here’s a few:
Jesus “said to them (the disciples) “Receive the Holy Spirit. If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven them; if you retain the sins of any, they are retained.” (John 20:22-23)
“Therefore confess your sins to one another, and pray for one another, that you may be healed.” (James 5:16)
“what ever you (Peter) bind on earth shall be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven” (Matthew 16:19)
“If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just, and will forgive our sins and cleanse us form all unrighteousness. If we say we have not sinned, we make him a liar, and his word is not in us. (1 John 1:8-1 0)
HOW SHOULD I EXAMINE MY LIFE?
Listen to your conscience. Consider using the 10 commandments as a guide (Exodus 20). Reflect on how your relationship is with God, how it is with your family, friends, co-workers, and reflect on how you treat yourself. Are your relationships with these people healthy?
You can also find “Examinations of Conscience” online and even on you phone as apps.
DO I HAVE TO TELL EVERYTHING?
You should confess everything that you remember. You are not able to fool God, and it is to Him that you are confessing. If you
forget to mention some sin during confession do not worry, God forgives ALL your sins. But if you know your faults… be honest with yourself and bring them forward.
WILL THE PRIEST TELL ANYONE?
ABSOLUTELY NOT! The priest cannot even talk
to you about your own confession after it is complete. In no way are priests allowed to talk about anything that happens within the sacrament to anyone. Not even in a court of law.
The priest will not think poorly of you if you are trying
to be a better person. How can you be angry or disappointed with someone who is trying to do good?
HOW OFTEN SHOULD I GO?
We should participate in this sacrament as often as we have a significant division between us and God, and others. It is good to go before major feasts and on significant events in our lives. The Church recommends that we should approach this sacrament in preparation for receiving the Eucharist, and states that we should at very minimum reconcile ourselves at least once a year during the preparation for Easter.
HOW DO I GO TO CONFESSION?
If you are not sure what to do and say during the sacrament of reconciliation, do not fret. The priest will coach you through it. The following is the usual order of things:
- Pray before confession. Ask God to help you to know when you have sinned.
- When you come before the priest, tell him when the last time you came to confession was (# of weeks, months, years, or first time), and then confess all your sins.
- The priest may ask you some questions to see if you are truly sorry for your sins, and he will probably try to give you advise to help you sin less in the future.
- The priest will then ask you to say a prayer, or do a good deed to show your joy for forgiveness and to bring you closer to God and other people. This is called “Penance.”
- Following this the priest will likely ask you to say an act of contrition. (See below) This prayer helps you state your desire to return to God, and avoid sin.
- Finally: Jesus, through the words of the priest, gives you forgiveness. This is called the “absolution.” Listen to these words the priest says (in some form):
(quietly) O Lord God, Salvation of Your servants, gracious, bountiful, and long-suffering, Who repents concerning our evil deeds, and desires not the death of a sinner, but rather that he/she should turn from his/her wickedness and live: show Your mercy now upon Your servant N., and grant him/her an image of repentance, forgiveness of sins, and deliverance; pardoning his/her every transgression, wether voluntary or involuntary.
Reconcile and unite him/her to Your Holy Church, through Jesus Christ our Lord, to Whom, with You, are due dominion and majesty, now and for ever, and unto ages of ages.
(then aloud) May our Lord and God, Jesus Christ, By the grace and mercies of His love for us all, forgive you all your sins, and I, an unworthy priest, by the power given to me by Him, forgive and absolve you from all of your sins, in then name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.
prayer of Absolution
- When it is over, talk to God. Thank him for the gift of forgiveness and for His love. And as soon as you are able, go and do your penance.
A Prayer You Can Say Before Approaching For Confession:
Come, Holy Spirit. Help me to remember the words of Jesus asking me to be a loving person. Help me to know when I have sinned. Help me to be sorry for my sins. Help me to change.
An Act of Contrition:
O God be merciful to me a sinner.
O God cleanse me of my sins and have mercy on me.
I have sinned without number, forgive me, O Lord.
Another Act of Contrition (simplified)
O Lord my God, I love You with all my heart.
I am sorry for all my sins.
Please forgive me.
Help me to change.
